So, during the shit show that was lockdown three and a second round of homeschooling three kids under ten whist trying to do an MA, work and keep everyone fed and watered I had many many conversations with women, who like me, felt completely fucked by society, the government etc in the sense that mothers were just hung out to dry in this time and no-one gave a fuck. Now this isn’t to say that of course everyone else was fine, it was a pandemic, lots of people had it far worse it goes without saying. BUT. Mothers were pushed out of work, lost their jobs, lost their autonomy, became teachers, child psychologists, breadwinners and baby soothers all at once. The amount of women I know who had to give up work for homeschooling with very little choice is shocking. The responses from employers about the realities of trying to work and teach full time, sometimes multiple children, was completely insane. Mothers were brought to the brink trying to keep everyone else happy and sane and plodding along in the rain of those daily walks no-one could be fucking bothered with by now.
There was so much anger around, maternal rage is only a whispered concept as it is, robbing us of a base emotion (the only one men actually get to have ironically) and denying us any cathartic outpouring or release with which to try and let go and move on. But I had many many interactions with women who needed to talk, who needed to express what they had been through, how it had changed them, their families, their relationships with their children (sadly mostly not for the better either) and I thought a lot about how to try and document or collect these testimonies. How can we make a collection of most probably oral histories or testimonies that document this unprecedented and unique time for mothers so that their experiences aren’t lost. True to fashion they always caveat their stories with the fact that they are privileged and lucky and that they know and understand this in the greater societal and in fact global context but if this tiny section of north London women felt this viscerally about what they had been through then one can only imagine the depth of feeling that mothers have experienced elsewhere also.
I wondered about some sort of voice notes app where you can record what you want to say and it is collected somewhere – the sender then receiving some visual graphic of their voice note going somewhere – a shouting into the void – if you will. But I don’t know anything about collecting texts and I didn’t think if it were written histories I wanted to collect you wouldn’t get as many. People will over think what they write. You have to make things easy for people. Anyway, I parked this idea for a while and didn’t think more of it until I came across the work of Feminist artist Mierle Laderman Ukeles.
Ukeles explored notions of family, home and domesticity for around 1960 until the mid 80’s. She wrote a manifesto for what she termed Maintenance Art and in 1973 as part of a series of performances of over 8 hours each she cleaned the front steps of the Wadsworth Atheneum Museum of Art in Connecticut. In addition she scrubbed the interior floor, cleaned the cases of exhibition objects and locked and unlocked doors at certain times. All tasks associated with free or low paid labour.
When I discovered this work whilst preparing for the sex ed for parents workshops I have been doing I really wanted to include this art performance in a discussion about domesticity and gender roles in the home. I know that this is a really interesting and often very personal and sometimes even quite heated topic and I would love to try and get into it one day. Generally when I have facilitated these kinds of conversations they have been tricky for a number of reasons. It’s personal and people don’t want to always air that stuff in public, men feel like women attack them (generalising a bit) and women feel like men just don’t get it (again generalising somewhat) Bringing a third external way to frame this conversation – through art – would be so interesting!! Although I am having a dads workshop this week I am reluctant to bring it up as I think we need a balanced audience and also because I’m trying to focus on the sex ed for now. I know the basis of the idea to use art to facilitate tricky conversations is generally going well so far I need to not get too ahead of myself just yet. One topic at a time.
Until I met up with Stephanie Romig-Orr, an artist with a background in Environmental Narratives who also happens to work at UAL CSM and is also really into exploring this idea of domesticity and motherhood during the pandemic. We had the best first meet up ever talking feminism and art over coffee, our mutual interest in thinking about ways to express or document the experiences and subsequent feelings left behind by the last year and almost a half and to try and create something that also facilitates a coming together of parents or couples who may enter into the art work separately but leave it together. Exploring the Japanese concept of kinsugi (using gold to fill in cracks or fix back together broken china) as a literal and metaphorical glueing of smashed plates or crockery that is reborn in the process. As women come and smash plates that document their experiences or say what they wanted to all along, we will share these shards as an installation and then facilitate workshops that use the process of kinsugi (in some form) as well as dialogues around the central themes (and maybe examples of other art works like Ukeles) to try and build back together these smashed up narratives into something else new and perhaps more positive too.
I’m really excited about the prospect of opening this idea up within the project. I have been wanting to do something that involves more art making because I feel it’s an important part of the process but I also know that when you include making versus looking at art you exclude a whole bunch of people who don’t want to go near materials. I also think there is some refining of subject matter to be done when you are including making and with these initial workshop interventions the objective has been to learn more about parents and how the idea of art and sex ed can be used together. Gender divides in the home are still a huge subject and are massively relevant when it comes to teaching the next generation and dismantling patriarchy so I’m happy to be extending this area of conversation into the mix of the overall project and seeing where it goes.